what happens after the decision is made

11.8.15

Making a big life decision can be a tiring process. Weighing up all the pros and cons, going over possible scenarios in your mind and then committing to one can be so mentally draining that once you've finally made up your mind, it's like you never want to think about it again.



That's exactly how I feel. A few months back, I decided to consider moving interstate to be with my boyfriend. That's right - just to think about it. I had no timeline and things were kind of open-ended. Was it even the right decision for us? Did he actually want me to move? How would I cope being away from family and friends? What would happen with my job? These were all questions I considered on an almost-daily basis.

Then about a month ago - after what seemed like endless weeks of 'what if' scenarios - we both decided it was time to commit to a firmer course of action. I picked a date and from that moment my focus has been solely on making it all happen.

My family and friends know when I'm leaving and last week, when a lease application for our new home was approved, I spoke to my boss about a possible transfer. It all feels so real now and it's about time.

Since my boyfriend and I started dating eight months ago, this move has been on my mind. After spending some time in Sydney for work, a move back north for him was always on the cards. I knew if I wanted the relationship to continue that it would require a move from me too so while the final decision was only made a month ago, it feels as though it's been an awfully long time coming.

The trouble is that now my decision has been made and it's all out in the open, I'm finding it hard to stay focused here when all I can think about is being there. The thought of getting up every day and carrying on with a life that doesn't even feel like my own anymore is difficult when all I really want to be doing is packing up my apartment and setting off for my new life up north.

Apparently it's all to be expected and my anxiety to just get over the finish line so to speak could be a sign of stress. But, according to research, there are a couple of little ways I can better enjoy the ride and even if you're not facing a big life transition, I'm sure these little snippets of advice will prove helpful.


Focus on today

Long term goals are important, but focusing solely on these can take the wind out of your sails today. If I think about what I have to do right now in order to meet my future goals, I think I'll be a lot more comfortable in the meantime. Instead of just wishing I was already in Queensland, I'm going to focus on small goals such as packing three boxes by the end of the week.



Take some time out

Apparently there's such a thing as too much planning! "When you make a bunch of big plans for the future, you might find your mind drawn a little too far ahead of you," says the self-help website Higher Perspective. "We’re not saying don’t make plans, but definitely keep a few hours free every day. Give yourself a little you time for a cup of coffee or a nice walk."


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